Victoria, Mummy is coming. Now, my mum is the Onijogbon-General of Gbogbo-Agbaye, the only civilian Dictator, who is more military than her Naval Officer husband. This woman has skills even the devil dabs to! She can detect lies from a million radius; embarrass you before any crowd. She manufactures domestic chores just like the way God…
Category: Dear Diary
Re Dear Diary: This is the tale of Mother Hen aka EDIYE.
People always ask why I don’t eat chicken, I lie it is a medical condition. Still, we both know it is more than a medical condition, it is my sheer hatred for wicked chickens that lay devilled eggs. Haa Toyooo! Almost three decades and I just can’t forget this hatred I have for Roosters. Let…
What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done that seemed so right when you did it?
It was 1st of February, 2020, the first day of the implementation of the Lagos State ban of specific private-public means of transportation based on public safety, in six out of 20 local government areas in the State. This ban affected Surulere, Lagos Mainland, Lagos Island, Ikeja, Eti Osa and Apapa. Everyone was aware of…
THE TALE OF MOTHER HEN aka EDIYE
Monday, September 2nd 2019. Dear Diary, This is the story of EDIYE *People always ask why I don’t eat chicken, I lie it is a medical condition, but we both know it is more than a medical condition, it is my sheer hatred for wicked chickens that lay devilled eggs. The medical condition only came…
Dear Diary; We must never be too big to show empathy
Dear Diary: March 2nd 2019. We must never be too big to show empathy. Just because I can be jagbajantis with my schedule, I made myself and Sam walk into the Red Cross Society Orphanage Home two hours earlier then the Lagoon Service Project team. No thanks to my selective hearing and Sam just…
Dear Diary; This is about Ashake and the mad stray dogs!
Dear Diary: 21st February, 2019. My name is Ashake and this is my story with the mad stray dogs. We have a useless neighbour with annoying straying dogs. Due to the malfunctioning of my car, I must either hitch a ride to work or be late. Being late is not even an option, because when…
Dear Diary; KEEP THE BODY, TAKE THE MIND! In other words, break the will to resist
Dear Diary: October 1, 2018 I am so grateful i was born FREE!!! *This is the story of Rufus – Uwuakhuahen Akenkpaye Ewuare Akenzua XII – the Prince from Africa.* He won’t even bow to Sir Joshua John Ward. This made him furious as Rufus was constantly in his way, stopping him from mistreating slaves….
Dear Diary; If you see something, say something.
September 19, 2018. Desike soro! Please talk to Mummy! I blurted out in frustration. She just laid there almost unconscious. I Knew what could have happened, but my head refused to comprehend it. As I lifted my three year old, blood gushed out. I was mad with rage. I drove breaking all traffic rules, I…
Dear Diary; “What a man can do, a woman can equally do” there goes the legendary quote.
*June 14th 2018* *4:34pm* Where are you? I asked Peperenpe. We are just about to leave Alausa. We? Who are we? She did a mental head count as she was humming, Myself, Tee, Maxi and Alika……………Sazzy, leave me jare! Better leave that your Office now and join us. *4:50pm* I called to know their location….
Dear Diary; It was Titilola that inspired this one – My waist beads!
Dear Diary, *June 10th, 2018.* Some days are just so blessed that you have no choice than to spend your day with GT Bank. The online platform won’t work and there is an emergency transfer to be made; then the bank has the guts to hold your money by a debit alert from the previous…